Wretched Man That I Am!
Who will deliver me from this body of death?

Mar

3

Marriage Retreat, The Cost of Forgiveness and the Puritan Reading Challenge

Filed Under puritan reading challenge, reading, retreat

 

My wife and I were blessed enough to abandon our children for a couple days last weekend and attend our church’s Young Couples Retreat at Horn Creek Ranch outside of Westcliffe, Colorado.

The speaker, Mark Bates, was fantastic and it was a very, very, very good weekend. Of all the ‘couple-y’ things he spoke on, one small part proved to be my ‘aha’ moment of the weekend. While speaking on Extending God’s Mercy, in the context of our marriages, he spoke of the Cost of the Forgiveness. What is probably a simple concept to many others is something to which I had never given much thought–Primarily, the fact that forgiveness is never free. It has a cost.

In short, when we forgive someone, we willingly choose to accept the pain of the offense and any cost incurred. We foot the bill. We endure the hurt. We suffer the sorrows.

Mark used the simple illustration of an uninsured driver damaging your vehicle in a fender bender. If we choose to let the incident go, our automobile must still be fixed, but we are the ones picking up the tab. The uninsured loser, scumbag walks away free because of our mercy. Basic, but again… I’ve never given it much thought.

Of course you know where this led? I am the uninsured loser scumbag and Jesus’ shed blood is the payment for my scumbagginess.

When we can forgive others, we do, in fact, discover the cost is worth it. Of course, this is easier said than done… and of course, we will receive strength from God and the Holy Spirit to enable us to carry out the actual forgiving. In the process, God’s love heals us, renews our relationships and lets us (as I tell my 6 year old when we talk of forgiveness) flush our bitterness, bile and bad, bad feelings down the toilet (if you are trying to get across to 6 year olds, any illustration with poop or a toilet will go a long way).

The best thing about being able to successfully forgive is that while we struggle to do it, we identify all the more with God’s ultimate sacrificial act for us.

As Providence would have it, later that night I started book three of the Puritan Reading Challenge, Thomas Watson’s The Godly Man’s Picture.Right in the first chapter… more gems on Forgiveness.

For this shall every one that is godly pray unto thee (Ps. 32:6)

Holy David at the beginning of this psalm, shows us wherein true happiness consists; not in beauty, honor, riches (the world’s trinity)—but in the forgiveness of sin.
…
This is an incomprehensible blessing, and such as lays a foundation for all other mercies. p.9.

He who is pardoned, is all bestrewn with mercy. When the Lord pardons a sinner, he does not only pay a debt—but gives an inheritance! p.9.

Before sin is forgiven, it must be repented of.

Therefore repentance and remission are linked together: “that repentance and forgiveness of sins should be preached in his name” (Luke 24:47). Not that repentance in a popish sense merits forgiveness. Christ’s blood must wash our tears away—but repentance is a qualification, though not a cause of forgiveness. p.10.

How sad it is to lack pardon!
Caesar wondered at one of his soldiers, who was so merry when he was in debt. Can that sinner be merry who is heir to all God’s curses—and does not know how soon he may take up his lodgings among the damned!
How sweet it is to have pardon!
The pardoned soul may go to God with boldness in prayer. Guilt clips the wings of prayer, so that it cannot fly to the throne of grace—but forgiveness breeds confidence.

This great mercy of pardon David had obtained, as appears in verse 5: “You forgave me”. And because he had found God “a God of pardons” (Neh. 9:17), he therefore encouraged others to seek God in the words of the text: “For this cause shall everyone who is godly pray unto thee.” p.10.

So the weekend left me rejuvenated and eagerly anticipating being wronged in many, many ways so I can practice all I learned ;-)

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